MARRIAGE AND FAMILY
Marry: Taking as a husband or wife Marriage: Successful combination of a man and woman in a holy wedlock. Family:Group of people consisting of parents and children and sometimes close relatives or group of related people.
GODS CONCEPT OF MARRIAGE : Genesis 2:24 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Mans concept may fail buts Gods concept can never fail.
1. Marriage is good Genesis 2:18 And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Proverbs 18:22 Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD.
2. Marriage involves leaving father and mother Mark 10:7-8 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and cleave to his wife; And they twain shall be one flesh: so then they are no more twain, but one flesh. Matthew 19:5-6 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
3.It involves cleaving Ephesians 5:31 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.
4.One flesh Ephesians 5:31-32 For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh. This is a great mystery: but I speak concerning Christ and the church.
The mystery of one flesh a) Treat your spouse as yourself because you are one. b) Make no provision for divorce. c) Husband and wife share your bodies. 1 Corinthians 7:3-7 Let the husband render unto the wife due benevolence: and likewise also the wife unto the husband. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband: and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife. Defraud ye not one the other, except it be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt you not for your incontinency. But I speak this by permission, and not of commandment. For I would that all men were even as I myself. But every man hath his proper gift of God, one after this manner, and another after that.
5. Openness to one another. Transparency , trust communication is required. Genesis 2:24-25 Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed.
6. Maturity: Marriage is not for boys and girls.Two factors that determines maturity is *The ability to make decisions and accept responsibility * Age
MARRIAGE COVENANT Psalm 89:34 2Timothy 2:13 Acts 10:34 God is a God of covenant. He is not a respecter of persons but a respecter of covenants.
Marriage is essentially a covenant relationship not just a promise . Malachi 2:14
A promise is a verbal of written declaration to do or not to do something.. No condition is attached to it.
A covenant is a formal agreement that is legally binding. It is a contractual agreement with witnesses . It is usually written and there are conditions attached to it. Nature of a covenant:
A covenant of marriage is two sided :-horizontal & vertical
Horizontal :- Between a man and his wife. The man and the woman both understand and obey the terms of the covenant. Whatever you do against your spouse God is seeing it.
Vertical:- This involves God & Man(Husband + wife) Gods own side is constant and certain. God is not !ore faithful in one marriage than another. He is no respecter of persons. What he does for one he will do for another.
TERMS OF THE COVENANT 1. Love Ephesians 5:25 Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it; a) Love without reservation b) Love unconditionally c) Love continuously .
2. Submission Ephesians 5:21 Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God. Ephesians 5:22 Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.
3.The Man ( Husband & Wife ) God brings this two together to build. Hebrews 3:4 For every house is builded by some man; but he that built all things is God. Man must accept responsibility over your marriage Life is about responsibilities, what your marriage turns out to be is your making. Husband and wife are expected to be ready to cooperate for a successful and hitch free marriage
4. Recognize that God is the ultimate builder. John 15:5 I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing.
CHARACTERISTICS OF THE COVENANT It is usually written Genesis 31:44, 48-52 Joshua 24:27 This covenant is for life Matthew 19:5-6 And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder. 1Corinthians 7:10, 11 & 29 , Isaiah 55:3, Malachi 2:14 Marriage should not be broken Psalms 89:34 My covenant will I not break, nor alter the thing that is gone out of my lips. It is sealed with the blood. It transcends generation.
HOW TO KEEP A COVENANT Many people get into marriage without understanding its a covenant. Marriage is not the coming of two individuals to bear children or have The same name. Marriage is much more than two people cohabiting under the same roof. Marriage goes beyound the issue of ordinary friendship. Marriage is meant to be exciting if the marriage covenant is kept intact.
PS As a married person you are into a covenant relationship with your own husband or your own wife. Untill you are married legally(in church, in court , in. presence of witnesses)you are not in a marriage relationship. You are not to deal treacherously (or traitor) with your wife or husband. God is a covenant keeper. Marriage covenant is meant to do both of you good and not evil. Fulfilling the terms of marriage covenant guarantees your enjoying Gods Favor.
WHAT TO AVOID OR DO TO KEEP THE MARRIAGE COVENANT God instituted marriage and family made the term and limits of marriage covenant available through his words in the bible Look into the word of God for solution to any challenge you are confronted with in your maarige. Don’t give room to strive and envy. Don’t report or discuss your spouse with relatives. Be open to correction.
REALITIES OF MARRIAGE COVENANT Misconception that marriage is all about coming together for bearing children. It is a life time agreement. Success is a function of working in the terms of the covenant.
HOW TO BE HAPPY IN YOUR HOME Get the best of time in your family. Happiness in the home will bring the best in you. A sorrowful heart is dangerous. Create humor in your home.
WHAT DOESNIT TAKE TO BE HAPPY Christ is the secret. A home full of Christ is filled with joy. The fear of God. Hospitality is the gateway to a happy home.
INTIMACY IN MARRIAGE(Closeness of your relationship with your spouse emotionally, spiritually, intellectually,sexually) Emotional:- Liking what he likes Spiritual:- Working together in Gods house Intellectual:- Reasoning together to solve issues Sexual:- You don’t neglect or deprive one another Confidential;-One secret together.
CHARACTERISTICS OF INTIMACY Mutual trust Tenderness Open communication Caring Apologies Forgiveness
MAKING RIGHT CHOICE IN MARRIAGE Choice is the fundamental principle of the kingdom of God. Choices make a world of difference between Sucess and failures Deut30:19 Get acquainted with God Job 22:21 Find a place to serve God Trace Gods pattern for your choice:-Marry a christian Amos 3:3 Can two walk together except they agree? Unity of the spirit(Repentance from dead work, Faith towards God)
KEYS TO SUCCESSFUL COURTSHIP Courtship is when you get more acquainted with your would be spouse. Know his origins. Spend quality time together. Public appearance. Having pleasure in common things Good communication